(Photo by Al Powers | SpyOnVegas.com)

That can’t possibly be these girls’ sexy face. We’re going to go ahead and assume they just got done doing shots of pickle juice. Either way, why would they go out of their way to advertise what huge V.I. Warshawski fans they are?

By Jason Scavone

(Photos by Melissa Reese | SpyOnVegas.com)

Somewhere, there are Budweiser Clydesdales hobbling around without feet.

By Jason Scavone

(Photo by Melissa Reese | SpyOnVegas.com)

Sure, it might seem like a good idea at the time to get the Louis Vuitton symbols bleached into your hair, but it’s not going to be so funny come 4 a.m. when the drunk girl next to you keeps trying to pick up your head and take it home.

By Jason Scavone

(Photo by Ray Alamo | SpyOnVegas.com)

Someone should get that girl on the right something to eat. She’s all skin and bones. HEYO! Thankyouwe’rehereallweek. Try the veal!

By Jason Scavone

(Photo by Jessica Blair | SpyOnVegas.com)

WARNING! Do not look directly at this picture unless you plan on having to bleach your eyes out. Instead, look at it through a welder’s mask, dark glasses or a pinhole, like you would an eclipse.

By Jason Scavone

(Photo by Ray Alamo | SpyOnVegas.com)

Shortly after this picture was taken, she chased a toddler through some tomato vines and collapsed of a heart attack.

By Jason Scavone

(Photo by Ray Alamo | SpyOnVegas.com)

By Jason Scavone

(Photo by Jessica Blair | SpyOnVegas.com)

It is a fashion week here, so the Eurotrash Exchange Program is in full effect. Somewhere in a Milan club, there’s a kid with frosted tips and a popped collar working the crowd.

By Jason Scavone

(Photo by Hew Burney | SpyOnVegas.com)

Sure, Natalie’s friends thought this would be a funny picture to take — until an ill-timed belly-flop from a guy who wasn’t paying attention led to the birth of Natalie’s son nine months later.

By Jason Scavone

(Photo by Ray Alamo | SpyOnVegas.com)

For just $1 a day, you can contribute to the Buy A Girl Some Damn Panties For The Love Of God Please Fund. That’s less than the cost of a cup of coffee. Won’t you please call now?

By Jason Scavone