Louie Anderson is going to want his license plate back. (Via myspace.com/doublewidevegas)

Rockabilly band Double Wide plays Diablo’s Cantina at Monte Carlo tonight as they go a little bit country with their Hoedown party. We’re not sure the country kids are going to love listening to rockabilly and hanging out with greasers all night, but hey, there’s some crossover appeal there. Consider this a chance to break out your biggest, shiniest belt buckle to before the PBR World Finals. It’s a dry-run for your a-pickin’ and a-grinnin’ side. Click for more words and pictures »

By Jason Scavone

None of these dudes looks like a ‘Lydia’ to us. (Via myspace.com/lydiavance)

Round 2 of the Rock the Roof battle of the bands continues at Diablo’s Cantina inside Monte Carlo tonight with rockers Lydia Vance, One Ton Project and Theory of Flight. We like that they’re pairing One Ton Project with Theory of Flight in a bill of “band names that cancel each other out.” Click for more words and pictures »

By Jason Scavone

You know why you don’t see a roof in this pic? Because it was rocked. Clean off.

Diablo’s Cantina at Monte Carlo moves into Round 2 of its $10,000 Rock the Roof battle of the bands contest tonight, lining up Sarah’s Downstairs, Valentine and Rule of Thumb at 9 p.m. Incidentally, we’ll be playing solo Rock Band at 9 p.m. for a grand prize totalling $1.92 in stale pretzels and beer in front of a transfixed audience of one confused cat who’s sick of the sound the drums make. Just kidding! We’d never own a cat. Click for more words and pictures »

By Jason Scavone

He wears this hat EVERYWHERE.

Leonardo DiCaprio stopped by Brand Steakhouse at Monte Carlo for dinner Friday night where he went to town on the menu, ordering up king crab scampi, Kobe beef carpaccio, sea bass, salmon, filet mignon, a veal chop, lobster mashed potatoes, asparagus, lobster bisque soup and baked Alaska. He is supposed to be playing Teddy Roosevelt in an upcoming. Maybe he’s just getting in character.

Saturday he was at Bare Pool Lounge at The Mirage along with actress Megan Good and Sunset Tan’s Janelle Perry and Kamela Brewer. We hope, though, that after two days on the town Scorcese didn’t get nervous when he couldn’t find Leo hanging around the set. The director has to make sure DiCaprio stays healthy so he can cram him into six or seven more movies.

By Jason Scavone

Nerd-wrangling for the small screen since 2007.

Chuck’s Yvonne Strahovski dined at Brand Steakhouse inside the Monte Carlo last night with her mother. The Aussie drank Brand’s Impeared cocktail during her two-hour stay at the restaurant and finished dinner with a nice cigar.

If you ever needed confirmation that Australians were the most fun people on the planet to be around, there you go. Even when having dinner with their mothers, the chicks are hitting the bar and sucking down stogies. Australia makes the rest of us clowns look like rank amateurs.

By Jason Scavone

Are you kidding? That’s it. We’re going home to learn how to DJ, right now.

DJ Tiesto stopped by Brand Steakhouse at Monte Carlo last night with friend Paula Vargas for surf and turf. Comedian Robert Schimmel, who performs tonight and tomorrow at the casino, was also there. Schimmel, it should be noted, not only beat cancer, but married a girl two years older than his daughter. We’re pretty sure he’s not even human, but some sort of indestructible force of nature.

St. Louis Rams running back Steven Jackson, meanwhile, as at N9NE Steakhouse with coach Scott Linehan and one other guest talking football the entire night. Jackson had the filet and creamed corn (we didn’t think anyone ate that stuff voluntarily as an adult) and chased it with a few Palomas.

By Jason Scavone

That gigantic glass and not a drop of booze? Kind of a waste.

Playboy playmate Destiny Davis and little sister Lacey were at Diablo’s Cantina at Monte Carlo last night to celebrate the launch of Destiny’s website and Lacey’s 21st birthday, where they finished the night with a peanut butter brownie banana split adorned with sparklers. You’d think the Monte Carlo would put the kibosh on indoor pyrotechnics right now, but apparently not.

The girls enjoyed rounds of shots courtesy of Denver Broncos legend John Elway, who was there for dinner with sponsors of his Arena Football League team, the Colorado Crush.

By Jason Scavone

No, she’s just modeling a new line of athletic wear. (Via MySpace.com/dd0105)

Diablo’s Cantina at Monte Carlo is hosting a launch party tonight at 8 p.m. for Playboy playmate Destiny Davis’ new website, doubling as a 21st birthday party for little sister Lacey. We don’t know much about genetics — other than those Mendel graphs we had to learn in high school biology — but if we know anything, it’s that if Destiny is any indication of what her little sis looks like, you’re in for a solid two-fer tonight.

By Jason Scavone

Seriously, how long is it going to take the Monte Carlo Hotel and Casino to reopen its doors? Sure, the façade and top floors of the hotel were jacked up by a fire on Jan. 25 and subsequently a number of suites and guest rooms sustained water damage during the firefighting efforts, but come on – the casino could be running! Lance Burton! The Monte Carlo Brew Pub!

Oh. Well, it looks like the resort plans to reopen next Friday, Feb. 15, just in time for Presidents’ Day Weekend. Look at that. At least 1,200 guest rooms will be available, with 1,300 more projected for Feb. 22. As well, the 500 rooms directly affected by the incident will remain closed as they get fully remodeled. I guess every smoke cloud has a silver lining, huh?

The casino, convention facilities, restaurants, bars, wedding chapel and Spa & Salon will also reopen, except for the buffet and Brew Pub. And yes, Master Magician Lance Burton can go back to turning scarves into doves or whatever in his showroom, eliminating the need for him to do card tricks in the employee break room anymore.

By Pj Perez

(Lance Burton performs his “removing your underwear without taking off your clothes” trick with Monte Carlo worker Francis Espirito during a lunch break Wednesday. Photo courtesy the Monte Carlo.)

Yesterday “master magician” Lance Burton took time out from his busy schedule of conjuring cars out of thin air and turning paper into doves to entertain Monte Carlo employees while they, you know, try to put back together the hotel that caught on fire last Friday.

Here’s our question: If Burton, whose show typically runs five nights a week at the Monte Carlo, is a “master magician,” can’t he just make the damage disappear magically and save these people the trouble?

By Pj Perez