Plus ca change, right Holly?

Are you finally up from your turkey coma? Good. Welcome back. Let’s get down to business and see what you missed.

Blah, blah, blah, Criss Angel and Holly Madison at CatHouse and LAX inside Luxor Wednesday night.

Wow, not much, apparently. Except Formula One god Michael Schumacher at both locations, joined by fellow racer Mario Andretti at LAX. George and Phil Maloof were also at LAX for Thanksgiving eve, while CatHouse got Mike Tyson.

By Jason Scavone

We’re seriously starting to run out of can double entendres. (Photo by Melissa Reese | SpyOnVegas.com)

Pure Management Group is finishing off its food drive this week, offering complimentary admission with non-perishable canned goods to Pure at Caesars Palace tonight and LAX at Luxor tomorrow night. This is finally the opportunity you’ve been waiting for to go into Vons and load up on a cart full of yams and have a good excuse for the cashier. This time.

The can drive benefits Three Square.

By Jason Scavone

Holly Madison, Criss Angel and Paula Abdul. God bless America. (Photo by Alex Loc Thieu)

Here’s a list of people who were at Tryst inside Wynn Las Vegas Saturday night: Criss Angel, Holly Madison, Paula Abdul and Michael Bay. Give that a minute to sink in. You think you’re going to wake up screaming like it was all a bad nightmare, but it wasn’t. It’s like someone invited the keynote speakers to the 2008 International Conference of Everything That’s Bad and Wrong About Film, Television and Stage.

Tyrese was at Victor Drai’s table inside the club, and 2005 Playboy playmate Raquel Gibson was also in the crowd. They got to keep a lookout on the crowd for any more of Paula’s fans who looked like they might be ready to top themselves.

Madison, Angel and Abdul turned up at LAX inside Luxor, where Jason Statham and Noel and Liam Gallagher of Oasis were partying in celebration of Ricky Hatton’s win. Sister club Pure at Caesars Palace had Tracy Morgan and Saved by the Bell’s Mark-Paul Gosselaar along with Mike Epps and Mario Barth.

By Jason Scavone

Wild Kardashians, seen here in their natural habitat.

There’s nothing so heartwarming this close to the holidays as a tight-knight family traveling together … to see Usher. Kim, Khloe and Kourtney Kardashian were all in town this weekend at the Palms, staying in a Palms Place penthouse. They hit up Simon for dinner before heading to the show.

The girls turned up later at LAX inside Luxor along with younger brother Robert. We’re kind of surprised Kris didn’t turn up, too. It had to have been a tough weekend for her without anyone around to be an overbearing stage mom to.

Also staying at the Palms this weekend was David Beckham, who checked into the Hardwood Suite Saturday night. Beckham was in town for the Ricky Hatton-Paul Malignaggi fight at the MGM Grand Garden Arena. Click for more words and pictures »

By Jason Scavone

Don’t be fooled. If he can turn on Derek Jeter, he can turn on any of us.

Gary Sheffield was out at LAX inside Luxor last night, while UFC fighters Chuck Liddell, Leith Jardine and Dan Henderson were also there. Wasted Space at the Hard Rock, meanwhile, had Bill Goldberg (who had dinner at Nobu with Hulk Hogan) join Shef’s former Yankees teammate Jason Giambi and wrestler Brian Knobbs. We’re going to have to check the records, but this may make it the manliest night in Las Vegas since Charles Atlas and Frank Sinatra went to topless shows, fueled only on bourbon and cigars.

By Jason Scavone

(Photo by Jessica Blair | SpyOnVegas.com)

The Army Rangers’ Fishnet Brigade never really made the impact in Iraq that the Joint Chiefs had hoped for.

By Jason Scavone

It’s the future of 1983! (Photo by Al Powers | SpyOnVegas.com)

Federation hit the stage last night at Jet inside The Mirage for I Wear my Stunna Shades at Night. NASCAR driver Bobby Gordon was there, along with Sean Phillips of the San Diego Chargers and the Cardinals’ Eric Green and Samari Rolle. DJs Tiesto, Eddie McDonald, Faarsheed and Chris Garcia all hit up the show, as did Mac guy Justin Long with Chris Gartin.

Now, the New York Post contends:

Justin Long is in a downward spiral when it comes to women. After Drew Barrymore broke up with him, Long took up with Kirsten Dunst, maintaining an on-again, off-again relationship for months with the “Marie Antoinette” star. But on Halloween, the “Mac Guy” hooked up with trampy bisexual Tila Tequila in Las Vegas. Spies said the two were spotted at Los Angeles airport and nightclub Noir, where Long ‘asked her to straddle him while making out. Eww,’ our spy sniffed. A rep for Long didn’t get back to us.”

We’ll go ahead and assume that this translates to the alleged Long-Tequila hookup going down at Noir Bar below LAX at Luxor. That seems like seriously slumming it after Kirsten Dunst, but whatever. All we know is, if she gets John Hodgman’s job as the PC in those commercials, we’re going to be annoyed.

By Jason Scavone

Well, she’s practically faerie-sized, anyway.

Tila Tequila celebrated her 27th birthday Friday night at Christian Audigier the Nightclub inside Treasure Island with dinner at Social House before heading downstairs to the club. Tequila wore a kind of faerie princess costume, able to wave her magic wand and add 60-80 MySpace friends to everyone’s profile in a single swipe. After Audigier, Tequila went down to LAX at Luxor.

LAX’s sister club, though, Pure, had Wilmer Valderrama doing James Bond while presiding over a $20,000 costume contest, where he was joined by Marlon and Damien Wayans, dressed as Run DMC. Too Short also stopped in, and absolutely should have gone as Jam Master Jay.

Valderrama and Marlon Wayans bounced to LAX on Saturday, where Vernon Davis got to come out of the locker room after his Week 8 benching and banishment to the showers. Jeremy Jackson, after hosting Audigier’s Dia de los Muertos party with Grandmaster Flash, stopped by LAX as well.

Davis spent Friday at Drai’s inside Bill’s Gamblin’ Hall & Saloon, which also saw former American Idol contestant Ryan Starr, former Miss Nevada Katie Rees dressed as Snow White, and Sunset Tan’s Janelle Perry.

By Jason Scavone

Nipples fighting through leather. Reason No. 459 why we love Halloween. (Photo by Eric Ita | SpyOnVegas.com)

LAX at Luxor holds its industry costume party tonight, where the table with the best group costume wins a trip to Aura Nightclub at Atlantis in the Bahamas. There’s a pretty good chance you’re going to have to wear that costume when you take the trip though, so choose carefully. You don’t want to have to explain to everyone on the island why the 12 of you are dressed like the Monchichis. Click for more words and pictures »

By Jason Scavone

Now someone has gone and mock-embarrassed sex-tape Kim. Great. (Photos by Scott Harrison | Retna)

Kim Kardashian celebrated her birthday Friday night at LAX inside Luxor, bringing boyfriend Reggie Bush, who’s recovering from arthroscopic knee surgery. She also brought along sisters Kourtney and Khloe, who are listed as day-to-day and are probable to start against the Bengals on Sunday.

Actually, Kourtney and Khloe Kardashian would be listed as six-point favorites against the Bengals.

By Jason Scavone