The Real Touch inspires such devotion it leads to outlandish hair. (Photos by Hew Burney | AVN.com)

There were two different kinds of love doll being sold on the floor of AEE, the Real Doll and Lovable Dolls. There were also two different kinds of devices wherein one would insert one’s junk, and it would simulate the sexual activity going on in a corresponding video.

Do you realize what this means? We are only months away from a terrifying Blade Runner future.

When the pleasurebots and Rutger Hauers of tomorrow come for you, don’t say you were never warned.

Incidentally, of the two devices, one, the Real Touch, was designed in part by former NASA scientists, proving once and for all that the sex robot portion of the Space Station’s budget was not put in place in vain. The device, which costs $149 but requires a $1-per-minute subscription to the site’s videos, has upper and lower heating elements plus a lube reservoir and it changes how constrictive it is depending on what orifice is being used on-screen.

The other one was hard plastic that buzzed a bit along with the movies. It felt like it would be like trying to hump the game Operation.

This says nothing of the Japanese “masturbation machines,” which we couldn’t tell if they were meant to be taken seriously or not; or the Fleshlight, which can best be described as “vagina-in-a-can”; and the Uniram, of which the less said the better. Gallery of earthly delights after the jump, but probably not safe for work.

By Jason Scavone

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